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I've been a guest on more than 40 podcasts, talking about desire, fantasy, lasting longer, sex clubs and how couples actually stay close. Here are the conversations, grouped by topic and newest first within each group.

Latest: The Secret of Erotic Blueprints To Revive Your Marriage, Stronger Marria...

A couple I worked with had been together for six years. They shared a bed, a lease, friends, and holiday traditions. They had never once had a real conversation about money.

He paid for groceries and dinners out. She covered takeout. They each bought their own plane tickets and split the rest of th...

An online sex class won't fix a relationship. Nothing you watch on a screen will.

What it can do is give two people a shared language for something most of us were never taught to talk about. That's worth more than it sounds.

What a class gives you that talking alone often doesn't

Most couples do...

You're both in the kitchen at the end of a long day. Someone's scrolling, someone's loading the dishwasher. Nobody's fighting. Nobody's really connecting either.

Moments like that are where closeness quietly drains away, or quietly builds. And a lot of it comes down to four phrases:

• I love you.
...

Most people who tell me they "can't do dirty talk" aren't short on desire. They're short on practice.

The words feel strange in their mouth. They hear themselves say something sexy out loud and want to disappear under the covers.

That's normal. Dirty talk is a skill, and every skill feels clumsy a...

You text. They reply three hours later. You text again. They go quiet. Now you're anxious and they're annoyed, and neither of you is sure how you got here.

That's a relationship dynamic: a pattern you fall into together, again and again. Not one bad night. A loop.

I've been working with couples si...

"It just wasn't right." I hear that all the time about relationships that ended. When I ask what "it" was, most people can't say.

Often, "it" was a need that went unmet, sometimes for years, and never got named. If you don't know what you need, you can't ask for it. And if you don't know what your ...

When a man comes to me about what happens in bed, he rarely starts with the mechanics. He starts with how it feels: the dread before, the replay after, the sense that sex has become an exam he keeps failing.

I've been doing this work for more than fifteen years. Sometimes these struggles point to p...

You ask how they're doing. They say "fine." You ask again, a little more gently. They change the subject, or pick up their phone, or go quiet.

You want more closeness. And the more you push for it, the further away they seem to go.

If that's where you are, you're not alone. And there's good news: ...

Keeping sex alive is one of the hardest parts of a long-term relationship. It's also one of the most common struggles I hear about.

And yet some couples stay sexually connected for years. What have they figured out?

In my work with couples, I see the same things show up again and again in the ones...

A letter in a Guardian advice column has stayed with me for years. A 63-year-old man, married for 45 years, wrote that he still loved his wife but no longer felt sexually attracted to her. It had faded slowly. He noticed other women, felt guilty about it, and had never acted on it. He had tried erec...

"I can live for two months on a good compliment." – Mark Twain

Complimenting someone is one of my favorite things to do. If I see something I like about a person, I just say it right then and there.

Even people who have a hard time taking compliments love it when someone notices something spec...