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Most people who tell me they "can't do dirty talk" aren't short on desire. They're short on practice.
The words feel strange in their mouth. They hear themselves say something sexy out loud and want to disappear under the covers.
That's normal. Dirty talk is a skill, and every skill feels clumsy a...
The questions people are embarrassed to ask out loud are the ones I care about most. Since 2016, HuffPost reporters have brought a lot of them to me.
Here's every HuffPost piece I've been featured in, grouped by the question it answers. Find the one closest to yours, read it, then try the small ste...
I originally wrote this piece for xxTALK, a program that brought women together to talk about their bodies and pleasure. xxTALK is no longer online, so here are the ideas I most want you to have.
Picture hiking up a mountain. The trail feels good, you're climbing, and then near the top you start go...
I originally wrote this piece for xxTALK, a program that brought women together to talk about their bodies and pleasure. xxTALK is no longer online, so here's the heart of it.
If sex has started to feel like the same script every time, you're not alone. Your go-to moves are a relief when you're tir...
Going to a sex club for the first time can be exciting as well as nerve-wracking. Seeing people live (and not on-screen) delighting in the pleasures of the flesh can be hard to fully prepare for.
When I first started exploring the sex club and swinging world years ago, I definitely remember feeling...
These days, so much attention goes to porn videos. But have you thought about erotic graphic novels?
My guess is no, because many folks haven't.
What I love about this kind of erotica is that you enjoy the turn-on with your eyes in a very different way than with a video. You're still looking at bo...
Some poems you read. This one you feel in your hips.
Jewel Mathieson's "We Have Come to Be Danced" is a call to stop performing for other people and move the way your body actually wants to move. Not the polished, please-pick-me version of ourselves, but the wilder, more honest one underneath.
I c...
This post is from April 2018. The Sex as Meditation workshops I co-led with H. R. are no longer running. Many of the same ideas about presence, pleasure and desire are part of The Sex Class.
An Introduction to Sex as Meditation: how to turn the erotic into a mindfulness practice.
One of the core b...
For a lot of us, sex doesn't "count" unless there's an orgasm. Both people have to finish, right?
It's so normal that it's become a habit. And like a lot of habits, it can quietly take over your bedroom.
I love orgasms. I'm not here to talk you out of them. But when the orgasm becomes the whole po...
You should be like this. You should do that. If you want a healthy sex life, you should try this with your partner. There are "shoulds" in every direction you turn these days. People, other people you have never met, are telling you how you should act. In graduate school, I heard the phrase "shouldi...
Someone recently wrote in with a question:
"What are your thoughts on male orgasm and Eastern or tantric practices that advise against physical orgasm (but might favor energetic orgasm)? I'm curious how holding back on orgasm affects the male body and psyche. I've always been a guy who ejaculates f...
Fantasy and imagination are a natural part of being human, and many of us fantasize about sexual things. Maybe it's someone sweeping you off your feet (romance), meeting a sexy stranger and going right at it (no-strings-attached passion), or taking someone, or being taken, in a rough way (dominance)...
