Blog
I originally wrote this piece for xxTALK, a program that brought women together to talk about their bodies and pleasure. xxTALK is no longer online, so here's the heart of it.
If sex has started to feel like the same script every time, you're not alone. Your go-to moves are a relief when you're tir...
"Is it normal that I finish this fast?"
It's one of the first things men ask me, sometimes before they've finished saying hello. The honest answer: sometimes yes, and sometimes it's worth working on. Here's how to tell the difference.
Finishing fast once in a while is normal
Plenty of things make...
At the start, you couldn't keep your hands off each other. You talked for hours. The sex was hot and frequent, and your partner's habit of alphabetizing the spice rack seemed adorable.
Then, one day, it didn't.
That's usually how people describe the end of the honeymoon phase. And the question I h...
Many people in relationships twist and contort themselves around their partner and forget about the things they want.
Often this happens right at the beginning of a relationship, in what's called the merging phase. Once the merging phase ends, the things you want that are different from your partne...
It's hard to know when it's time to ask an expert for help with your relationship.
Romantic relationships naturally go through ups and downs, and it's just plain hard to stay sexually connected over the years. Sometimes it's a rough patch and you'll figure it out. Other times, you need help from a ...
This post is from April 2020, written in the first weeks of the Covid-19 lockdowns. The lockdowns are over, but the three practices below still work for any couple who spends a lot of time under one roof. For more on keeping desire alive, see The Sex Class.
In times like these, with the changes the...
There's so much pressure on all of us to be amazing in bed.
Movies show us impeccably made-up actors falling gracefully into bed, fitting together easily and climaxing at the same time, all without smudging their mascara. Magazines tell us over and over how to wow him and have more intense orgasms....
This post is from November 2019. I no longer offer the Paris "Before and After" sessions. If you and your partner want help talking through boundaries and desire, here's how I work with couples now.
Meet me in Paris with your lover, and I will help you two have one of the most memorable erotic expe...
Going to a sex club for the first time can be exciting as well as nerve-wracking. Seeing people live (and not on-screen) delighting in the pleasures of the flesh can be hard to fully prepare for.
When I first started exploring the sex club and swinging world years ago, I definitely remember feeling...
It's happened to all of us at some point.
Day in, day out, you're living a nice, predictable life with all your ducks in a row. Then life throws you a curveball that changes everything, including your sex life.
In 2017, I fell off a horse and broke my leg. (Here are all the juicy, excruciating det...
There's one question I want answered in the first session with every new client:
"What makes you difficult to be in a relationship with?"
It tells me a lot about how this person's relationships have been unfolding, and where we need to start.
How self-reflective are you?
This question gives me a...
For a lot of us, sex doesn't "count" unless there's an orgasm. Both people have to finish, right?
It's so normal that it's become a habit. And like a lot of habits, it can quietly take over your bedroom.
I love orgasms. I'm not here to talk you out of them. But when the orgasm becomes the whole po...
